Thursday, September 14, 2006

Sponge Girl: "Not the pigeons!"

According to insiders, a furious Paris Hilton has accused everyone's favourite philanthropist, the adora-cute Sponge Girl, of attempting to destroy her credibility in polite society. Ms Hilton is said to be upset by Sponge Girl forwarding her outfit ideas to costume party host Sir Richard Branson. Another guest, who did not want to be identified, explained: "As if Paris hadn't been mortified enough about being denied entry to Prince William's private loo, she suddenly realised there are dozens of other young strumpets dressed as Alice, specifically on Branson's orders , and they all have better hair than her!"

It is understood that Ms Hilton, fearing that Lindsay Lohan may have cornered the hoo-hah flashing niche, sought Sponge Girl's counsel to discover a newer, edgier activity she could make her own and even trademark. In the course of the conversation Ms Hilton revealed her intentions of stealing the limelight at the Mad Hatter's Tea Party by turning up as Alice. Sponge Girl, however, denies forwarding the information to the billionaire host: "Look, she scribbled Tell everyone to call me Alice - I wanna stay in (sic) on the RSVP card, not much I can do about that. Besides, I don't think that's even the reason Richard decided to play with her a bit - I think he was more upset at her stapling the rsvp to the carrier pigeon instead of using the ribbon like everyone else."

The author/style guru/celebrity pie-thrower said she was not concerned of any angry reprisals from Ms Hilton: "She's yet to figure out the differences between a snail mail and an email address, and I have caller I.D., so I can't say I'm worried."