Sharon Stone: "But What About Me?"

Sharon Stone, most famous for allowing bloggers the chance to gratuitously use the word 'cooter' , has lashed out at Sponge Girl for ignoring her at numerous functions, and for not making a public statement against her.

"I mean, really, how can I possibly keep building my reputation as a try-hard hypersexual snakewoman if people don't talk about me? Sure, she'll comment on Tom Cruise and his crimes against humanity - and don't even get me started on the Hilton Copycat Parade - but when someone really needs the column centimetres the bitch blanks me. "

In response Sponge Girl commented that "The world's changed, pumpkin. Flashing one's naughty bits in a movie ain't all that shocking these days - I mean hey, Lindsay Lohan did it at a kids' show, so that's your first clue that it ain't exactly hardcore anymore."

After being shown images of the pitiable state Ms Stone wallowed in these days, Sponge Girl's cold heart softened, and she agreed to make the following comment:

"Fine. Sharon Stone, you're a lousy mother, a haggard has-been and to be quite honest, the cooter schtick is starting to wear a bit thin. Happy? You owe me one."

After hearing Sponge Girl's comments, Ms Stone was filled with righteous fury, and promptly flashed her cooter at a five-year-old.